Wow, it's been so long; this blog doesn't even look like me anymore. Weird.
So someone asked for my website and all I had to give him was this and then I thought about how long it had been since I updated it and how there weren't any pictures of recent work and how the last few posts were super personal and how much my work has changed in the last couple of years and how my goals for my work have changed and how I've been thinking of changing the name of my blog for forever- you know, all those thoughts... And I started to think about how stupid that is and what's my excuse and all those thoughts... And then I stopped myself. And I told myself I would gain nothing by berating myself and my actions- I mean we've proven that over the last couple decades, right? We already know that behavior isn't going to get us any closer to where we'd like to be, so instead of making yourself feel like shit for all the things you HAVEN'T done, why don't you just shut the fuck up and do what you want to do?! Right Now. Stop waiting for this or that to happen, for the perfect photograph or inspirational/ funny/ clever post and just fucking write! This isn't fucking rocket science, people!
And after that little motivating pep talk, I wrote down my new found wisdom in my journal and now I'm sitting here. And with that insight in hand, I've also decided to try to be a bit more authentic. Which means that sometimes I'm gonna swear. Because in real life, I hang around a lot of people that cuss like sailors and drink like fish, so the swear words are just a part of who I am right now. If you're offended, I do truly apologize and I don't want anyone to feel uncomfortable so just don't read my blog, or my facebook, or look at my Instagram. Because this is MY little corner of the internet. Mine. Just mine. I don't have to compromise on the colors because they're too girly or flowery or GREY or they have too many skulls on them. I'm sorry Darling, but I EFFING LOVE THE COLOR GREY! Period. Can't get enough of it. And you know what? I'm done being sorry for who I am and what I like and what I want to do or not do. I'm done feeling guilty for not liking the same things that other people do. I want tattoos on my wrists really bad, and I'm done trying to explain that I'm never gonna get some super straight laced corporate gig that doesn't allow visible tattoos, and if I do, I'll Deal With It! Or that from now on, every time I wear a cocktail dress, I'm gonna look like a trashy slut. Really? Who do you think looks trashier- the girl with a tramp stamp or the girl with a sparrow on her wrist? Yeah, that's what I thought, and by the way I've already got a tramp stamp! Before I had ever heard that term. Awesome.
Oh, and one more thing. When I choose my friends and the people I will fly across the country for or donate a kidney to or never lie to because I love them too damn much, that decision is not based on net worth, annual income, designer ANYTHING or everything, if they're one of the "beautiful people" or are in "the scene". Wtf does that mean anyway? Or if everyone else thinks they're cool or sexy or they've got a bazillion follwers on facebook/ twitter/ tumblr/ whatever. Who effing cares? I've never decided who to spend my time with based on those things and right now I've got a couple friends that I know I could call at 3 in the morning because I'm stranded at a gas station without gas or my wallet and they would answer, get out of bed, get dressed and drive across town, get a speeding ticket on the way and still give me a hug when they saw me as they swiped their card to pay for my being a dumbass. Cuz that's how we roll.
That kind of turned into a rant, but who cares? This is MY blog bitches! (Sorry mom, I know you account for 25% of my readership, but you know this is really me.)
Can't wait to talk to you all again soon.
xoxo, Iris
